Lost Love
by LizzieLurver
Summary: JackJuliet Set in the future. Jack in unaware that Juliet has been rescued from the island, they're reunited, lots of Jacket stuff within as you may have guessed. Chapter 15 now up - Completed
1. Chapter 1

-1**Title: **Lost Love

**Rating: **PG-13

**Pairing: **Jack/Juliet

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Lost or any of these characters

**Chapter 1**

Jack Shephard looked at his watch, 8:15am. He hadn't slept a wink all night. It was becoming a habit of his, not sleeping, and it had gotten worse since he had left the island. He knew it was a mistake, even if Kate insisted that it wasn't, he had to get back.

Back to her.

He was interrupted from his thoughts when he heard a nurse calling his name. "Dr. Shephard? Are you feeling okay?"

Jack straightened himself up and blinked a couple of times, "Yeah, yeah I'm fine.. I'm just gonna go check on this patient". He stared at the ground as he made his way into his patient - the woman he had saved from the burning car. Her son was sitting in a chair talking to a woman Jack didn't recognise.

"Oh hello", she smiled brightly. "You must be Dr. Shephard, I'm Karen, one of her closest friends". She gestured to the woman across the room in the hospital bed, who appeared to be sleeping. "I've been looking after her son, a couple of days a week while she's been in here. And can I just say Dr. Shephard, what you did, it was.."

"It was what anybody would have done", Jack answered, he was getting tired of people praising him for what he did.

Karen smiled again "Well, all I wanted to say was thank you". She glanced at the clock, "Oh, I'm already late, I better get going", she said as she began putting her coat on.

Jack nodded and forced a smile back when he noticed another woman curled up in a chair at the far end of the room, her hair messily fallen across her face she seemed to be sleeping too. "Who's she"

Karen looked from Jack to the woman. "That's her sister, she stayed up all night here, worrying about her, poor thing", she sighed and turned to the boy "I'll see you later okay?". The boy nodded as Karen left the room.

Jack wandered over to the patient's bed and picked up her chart, examining it. He could hear the woman who had been asleep in the chair moving behind him.

He looked over to the boy who was now trying to adjust his sling. Jack looked down at the chart again, desperately thinking up excuses of why he must leave the room suddenly, he really wasn't in the mood for more small talk with the friends and family.

"Julian, sweetheart let me do it". The woman got up and walked over to her sister's son and fixed the sling around his neck.

Jack froze.

_No, no it couldn't be. It's impossible. You're just imagining things, Jack, snap out of it!_

The woman looked up and their eyes met, her face went blank. Jack felt numb inside, he could barely utter the words.

"Juliet?"


	2. Chapter 2

-1**Chapter 2**

Juliet refused to believe what she was seeing. She stood for a few minutes staring at him, her mouth open, not at all sure what to say. He was really there, Jack was really there, standing right in front of her with a clipboard in his hand staring back at her. After what seemed an eternity for both of them, Juliet spoke.

"Jack", she whispered, "What are you doing here?". She knew if it were her she would have wanted a slightly different greeting, but she was still in shock. She had made it her aim to cut everyone she had met on that island out of her life, she wanted to forget, start again. A new beginning.. Even if it meant never seeing Jack again, never hearing his voice, never feeling his fingers touch her skin. But now he was here, what the hell was he doing here?

"I.. I work here Juliet", he tried calm himself but he couldn't do it. She was here, in this hospital. Juliet was the sister of the woman he saved, the aunt of the boy he pulled out of the burning car, and she was here. Not on the island, but standing right in front of him with a look of complete and utter shock on her face. Jack wondered if he was dreaming or if he was possibly losing his mind. It wasn't right. There was only one rescue plane that left the island and she wasn't on it.

"What are you.. How are.. Juliet you're…", he couldn't find the words. He didn't know what to say. For countless nights he had lay awake in bed thinking of her, dreaming that he could just be with her one more time.

Juliet's eyes never left his, he could see tears pricking up in hers. "Oh Jack.."

"God, I've missed you so much". Jack dropped the clipboard, ran over to where she was standing and grabbed her in his arms. He held her as close as her could, his head buried in her luscious blonde hair. She slipped her arms around his waist pulling herself into him, tears flowing down her cheeks.

There would be time for questions later, now was just about them. And only them.

Julian stood looking at them with a confused expression on his face. "Aunt Juliet? Why are you crying, are you sad again?". Juliet lifted her head slightly from the crook of Jack's neck to answer him. "No honey, I'm not", she brushed a couple of tears from her face and smiled, "Far from it actually". Julian, still looking terribly confused, retreated back to his seat.

"Julian, if I go to the coffee shop with Dr. Shephard would you be a good boy and stay here?". Julian nodded. Juliet turned back to Jack and studied his face.

"I think we've got a lot of catching up to do"

"I just can't believe that you're here", Jack fiddled with his cardboard coffee cup. "I've spent every waking moment thinking about you and now.. You're here. How did you get off the island, I don't understand"

Juliet took a sip of her coffee "Well, about a week after you guys left another helicopter came and, well.. rescued us.. Jack, I'm sorry I didn't try to contact you, I just..". Jack placed his hand on hers "Hey, it's okay, you don't need to explain, I wanted a fresh start too you know"

She smiled at him. How he missed her smile, the way she looked at him, studied him, she was so beautiful it was almost too much to bare. He had no idea how he had survive the past few years without seeing her face everyday. "Thanks Jack.. I thought about you everyday too, I wanted to see you but I told myself it was for the best if I didn't see anyone from.. there", she sighed.

Jack squeezed her hand. "Was it just you?". Juliet shook her head, "Oh no, there a couple of us actually - me, Claire and Aaron, James and a few others.. Oh and Scott too"

"You mean Steve?"

Juliet laughed, "Yeah Steve, I've always wondered how he didn't go crazy with everybody getting his name wrong". Jack sniggered, "Good to hear Claire and Aaron got to go home, I can imagine it wouldn't be the best childhood growing up on an island".

Juliet nodded, "She was so happy, everybody was.. I think James might have even shed a few tears". Jack smiled, "You're not serious". "Yeah you're right, I'm not!", Juliet giggled. "You could tell he was happy though"

They fell silent for awhile. Juliet thought about how good it felt to back with him again, smiling, laughing, talking, touching. "So Jack, how've you been?", she looked up and met his gaze. He smiled sadly "Not too good to be honest.. Though you can probably tell, right?"

"What, because of the beard?"

Jack pretended to look hurt, "You don't like it?". Juliet tried not to laugh. "Well it's very.. beard-like"

He looked down "I really wanted to go back Juliet, to the island.. I couldn't live without you, I've never forgiven myself for leaving you behind there. I'm sure your sister told you the guy who saved her was standing on the side of a bridge when she crashed her car"

"Oh Jack.."

He looked up at her, tears in his eyes. "I'm so sorry Juliet, I'm so sorry". Juliet stood up and walked over to him "It's okay Jack, you don't need to say sorry, I'm here now, it's all going to be okay". She took his hand in hers as he stood up, allowing her to place her arms around his waist again and hug him tight.

He was aware of the doctors and patients around him staring, but he didn't care, he was with her, holding her, they could stare all they liked.

Juliet gently pulled herself away from him and pulled a few napkins off the table. Jack watched her "What're you doing?"

"You got a pen?"

Jack felt in his pocket and produced a pen and handed it to her, "Juliet, what..". She started to scribble something down on the napkin. "Well Jack, I don't exactly want us to lose touch now, do I?". She placed the pen back in his pocket and placed the napkin in his hand.

"You're giving me your number?"

Julie smirked at him "I sure am.. Don't tell me you don't want it, Jack?"

"Of course I want it!", he smiled shyly and tucked it into his pocket. "I'll err.. Call you then?"

"Well sure, if you want to, go for it!. I better go or else I'll be late, got the plumber calling over soon". Jack leaned down and gave her a quick kiss on the cheek, she looked down in an unsuccessful attempt to hide her blushing face. "Sorry, to much?"

"Not at all Jack. It was.. Really good to see you", she smiled at him once more and made her way towards the hospital exit. He kept his eyes fixed on her until he could see her no more.

"You too".


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

Juliet sat with her legs tucked under her, sipping a cup of hot chocolate. The events of earlier hadn't at all sunk in yet. One minute she was asleep in a very uncomfortable hospital chair, and the next Jack was standing there in front of her.

There was so much she wanted to ask him, so much she wanted to know, she was angry with herself for dashing off like that so suddenly. "The plumber? What were you thinking Juliet?". She shook her head and took a gulp of her hot chocolate.

It wasn't that she wanted to leave, she would have loved nothing more than to stay with Jack for longer, much longer. But she just couldn't push something out of her mind. He had left her behind. Jack had gotten on that rescue helicopter and left her. Sure enough he had said that he would come back for everyone else, but she knew in her heart it wasn't going to happen. Ben had told her countless times one couldn't just leave and return to the island whenever they pleased. Juliet had known he wasn't going to come back for her, and she had a feeling Jack knew it too when he took a step onto that helicopter.

Juliet was sure he hadn't meant to do it, he did care about her…didn't he?

_Of course he cares about you, Juliet, he made that more than clear at the hospital, stop being so stupid and let it go!_

Sighing, she reached for the remote and turned on the TV. Apparently Jack had been all over the news when he saved Rachel. How did she, of all people, not know it was him? It would have been a different situation if it wasn't Rachel involved in the crash, seeing as she had been very busy lately, but it was. Her own sister had nearly died and she hadn't even asked to thank the man who saved her. Though with hearing the news her head hadn't been at all functioning properly.

Juliet switched off the TV and stood up, wondering what to do, when the phone rang. She almost crashed into the coffee table trying to get to it before it rang out. She picked up the receiver.

"Hello?"

"Hey Jules" - it was Jack. She suddenly felt very guilty about thinking those things about him, would he have called so soon if he didn't care? No chance… this was Jack, a part of her thought he might not even call at all. But here he was..

Juliet grinned and sat back down "Hey Jack"

"Sorry I didn't call sooner but my shift at the hospital just ended, and I'm not sure they'd be happy if I took off more time to talk to the 'mysterious blonde' "

Juliet giggled, "That what they've been calling me, then?"

"Yeah, I guess none of the staff are used to seeing broken Dr. Shephard happy". Juliet tucked a piece of hair behind her ear "I.. made you happy?"

There was a slight pause. "Ecstatic".

Another pause as Juliet opened her mouth to say something, but couldn't quite find the words. All past accusations of Jack flew right out the window.

"So anyway Jules, how are you?"

_Jules_ - she loved the way he said her name. "I'm good Jack.. Really good in fact!"

"Oh yeah, and why might that be?"

"Don't be so modest Jack, you know why"

Juliet heard him laugh on the other end of the line. "Is it because of what I hope it is?"

She smirked. "What do you think it is Jack?"

He laughed again and cleared his throat . "So err, the main reason why I called was to err..", there was a pause.

"Yes, Jack?"

"..Was to see.. If you maybe wanted to… see me again sometime… soon?". Juliet didn't say anything - was he asking her out? Or did he just want to meet up casually to talk? No, no it was definitely more than talking… or was it? "Why is this man so hard to read!", she asked herself.

"Yes Jack, of course, that would be.. Nice" She decided that she would have accepted either way.

"Oh!, well good!", he answered. Juliet thought she could hear a hint of surprise in his voice. "So… when will I see you?"

Juliet stopped to think "How about tomorrow? We could.. Go out for lunch, if you wanted to?".

It appeared Jack didn't need to think, he answered straight away. "Yeah I'd.. love to"

If it wasn't a date it was just two friends going out for lunch, if it was a date then it was… two people on a date. Juliet argued whether to just come out and ask him, but she couldn't pluck up the courage. If it wasn't she would have made a complete fool out of herself, and right now she wanted everything with Jack to go well.

"Good.. I'd love to too"

There was a pause as both of them racked their brains for something to say. "So you want me to pick you up or do you have somewhere in mind?"

"Do you?"

"I.. might do, but if you have somewhere you want to.."

Juliet laughed. "It's okay Jack, you pick.. You asked after all!"

"Well I do have somewhere in mind actually, I know you'll like this place Jules, they make the best grilled cheese sandwiches!… Apart from yours of course". She smiled "I wasn't aware that you ever liked my food Jack, you usually just threw it against the wall"

"I ate the cheese burger", he said quietly. They both laughed.

"So wanna give me your address?". Juliet thought quickly "Oh err.. How 'bout you tell me where this place is and I meet you there instead?"

"Oh well.. Okay sure", Jack sounded confused, Juliet hoped he didn't think she didn't want him knowing where she lived because she didn't trust him. She did - completely.

She grabbed a pen and paper as Jack gave her directions to "Ben's".

"I have to say Jack, I don't like the sound of this place, the might mark you if you don't tip enough"

"Hey, I didn't pick the name!"

Juliet opened her mouth to reply when the doorbell rang. She took a quick look out the window.

"Listen Jack, somebody's here, I really gotta go, but 2:30 right?". Once again Jack sounded surprised.

"Oh.. Okay well yeah, 2:30. I guess I'll see you tomorrow then". Juliet started making her way towards the door, "And I'll see you, goodbye Jack"

"Goodbye Juliet". Jack hung up slightly confused as to why she had to go so suddenly, though she couldn't help it if somebody had called over, he supposed.

She smiled as she placed the phone on the hall table, took a quick look in the mirror and opened the door.

"Hey Derek"


	4. Chapter 4

-1**Chapter 4**

Jack sat in his office attempting to get through the tonnes of paperwork he was behind on, but his mind was somewhere else. He just couldn't stop thinking about her, Jack was almost sure he'd be writing 'Jack 4 Juliet' if it continued. Not that he minded, of course.

He decided he would go check on Rachel, see how she was doing. He wasn't one to check how a patient was doing, it was really an excuse to talk to somebody about Juliet without it looking suspicious.

Jack walked into her room to find her reading. "Afternoon Miss Carlson"

Rachel looked up, "Oh hello Dr. Shephard, I nearly didn't recognise you without the facial hair"

Jack smiled and nodded "Well, I decided it didn't really.. Suit me"

"Hmm, are you sure it didn't have anything to do with a certain Juliet?"

Jack looked at her, surprised. He wasn't aware that Juliet had told Rachel that she knew him. They were sisters he supposed. Noticing his puzzled face Rachel explained "She called me last night, told me you two had gone out for lunch yesterday".

Jack paused and tried to hide the fact he was smiling broadly "I don't.. see what this has to do with my beard?"

Rachel sniggered and went back to her book. Jack opened his mouth to ask how she was feeling when he heard his name on the intercom. "Would Dr. Shephard report to the main desk please? Dr. Shephard to the main desk, thank you."

"I better go see what that's about", he told Rachel. "No problem", she answered not taking her eyes away from her book.

Jack made his way to the receptionist "I was called?". The receptionist opened her mouth to answer when he heard his name being spoken by somebody behind him.

"Jack?"

He turned around to face whoever had spoken.

"Kate?.. What are you doing here?"

…..

Juliet shook hands with Jin, and leaned in to hug Sun "It's really good to see you two again". Sun smiled, "You too Juliet, and thank you". Jin gave her an appreciative nod as the two of them left the office.

Juliet smiled as they left and walked around her side of the desk and sat back down, she was just about to call her sister when there was a knock on the door.

"Come in!", she called.

The door swung open, and Juliet froze. The man entered her office and shut the door behind him. He turned to face her, an evil grin spreading across his face.

"Hello Juliet. Nice to see you again"

…..

"Kate, what do you want?".

Kate stared at him, a confused look on her face. Jack never spoke to her this way, it was usually him chasing her, him trying desperately to contact her.

"I want to tell you something, Jack"

He sighed and ran his hand over his head "Well make it quick because I'm sort of busy today". Kate bit her lip nervously, not quite sure how to start. "I see you shaved, it looks.."

"Kate, for God's sake, what do you want?", he shouted at her. Jack didn't know why he was so mad, he had no reason to be, Kate hadn't said anything to make him mad.

She averted her eyes to the floor, aware of the receptionist giving her suspicious looks. "I.. I've decided I want to go back with you.. To the island". She looked up to face him, expecting him to smile, expecting him to thank her, expecting him to hold her in his arms.. Or maybe that was just what she wanted him to do.

Much to her dismay, Jack did none of those things. Instead he did something she wasn't expecting.

"Kate.. I don't want to go back anymore..". Once again she looked confused "What? Why? For the past 3 years you've been pestering me to go back with you, and now that I say I will, you don't want to!"

Jack looked away "Yes Kate, that's right"

Kate rose her voice "Well why not! Why, all of a sudden, don't you wanna go back, why..". Jack cut across her. "Because I don't have a reason to anymore!"

Now, not only the receptionist was staring at them, but almost everybody within distance of hearing their argument.

Jack looked around him, suddenly feeling very embarrassed. "I think you should go now, Kate". He saw tears forming in her eyes, he turned and walked back down the corridor to his office, leaving Kate standing there with tears pouring down her cheeks.

The funny thing was, he didn't feel guilty.


	5. Chapter 5

-1**Chapter 5**

"I think it's time we had a little chat, don't you?"

Juliet opened her mouth in desperate search of something to say "What.. What are you doing here?"

When only another evil smirk was received she stood up and slammed her hands down hard on her desk, "What the hell are you doing here, Ben?!"

Ben smiled. "What? One friend can't visit another friend anymore? It's been along time Juliet, I thought you'd be happy to see me".

"When have I ever been happy to see you, Ben?", she shouted to him from across the room "One of my main reasons for wanting to leave that island, was to get away from you! And now you just decide to wander back into my life, pretending that you never lied to me, pretending you never hurt me, pretending you're some friend of mine? Well guess what Ben, you have never been a friend to me, during the four years I was on that island all you did was hurt me time and time again, shatter my dreams of ever going home and.."

That look of pleasure from seeing Juliet shocked had been wiped clean from his face, he had a feeling she wouldn't welcome him with open arms, but he hadn't expected her to explode like that 5 seconds after he entered the room. He tried to hide the fact she had cut him deep.

"Are you quite finished Juliet, I don't have all day".

Juliet raised her eyes up to meet his, Ben had never seen her look so angry.. And he had seen her angry..

"Then what do you want?"

"I want to discuss something with you.. If that's alright?"

"I'm not going back there, so don't try and talk me into it because it's not going to.. "

"No Juliet, that's actually not why I'm here.. Everyone was removed from that island in groups, and there is no possible way of any of us ever getting back again"

Ben had confused her, she couldn't think of another logic reason why he would be here. "Then what is it?", she said through gritted teeth.

"Well.. I've noticed you've been seeing Jack lately, is that right?, he said, that evil smile that had haunted her for years returning to his face.

_Jack? Jack? He's here to talk about Jack? What does my social life have to with Ben? Absolutely nothing, that's what!_

"Well yes, I've been seeing him.. But not.. You know, seeing him.. As such", she blushed, why was she blushing, she had nothing to be embarrassed about.

"Oh yes Juliet, I do know you haven't been 'seeing him', I don't think it would be very moral of you.."

"Not very moral, what's that supposed.. Wait, how do you know I've been seeing Jack? .. Have you been following me?". Juliet didn't know why she was surprised. It wasn't Ben if there wasn't some spying involved.

"That's not important right now Juliet, but what is important is the fact that you've been spending a lot of time with Jack.. But neglecting to tell him one small little detail I'm sure he has a right to know"

Juliet swallowed hard "I.. I don't know what you're talking about"

"Oh I think you do Juliet". She stayed silent, not knowing what to say and not really wanting to say anything.

"You're going to have to tell Jack about him, Juliet". Forgetting herself, Juliet replied "I don't have to tell him anything, he doesn't have to know, it's irrelevant, Jack and I are just friends anyway.."

She could tell Ben was loving every second of this.

"You may have moved on but Jack hasn't, he's still in love with you".

"You don't know that"

"I might not.. But you do.. And Jack certainly does"

Juliet stayed quiet, staring him straight in the face, not breaking eye contact. Why was Ben doing this to her? Why was he trying to drive Jack away from her? Again..?

Ben shifted his position and took a look at his watch. "Look Juliet, if you don't I will..". And with that he turned and walked out the door, without saying another word.


	6. Chapter 6

-1**Chapter 6**

Juliet clicked her seatbelt off and turned to Jack and smiled "Thanks Jack, tonight was really great". He nodded and gave her a small smile back, "So.. Are we.. Gonna do this again?". Juliet's smile faded, as she heard the flat tone in his voice.

"Don't you.. Wanna do this again, Jack?"

He noticed her quick change in expression. "No, I do! Really.. It's just that, well.. we've gone out a few times now, Juliet and I just wanted to know if we were..", he stopped and sighed.

Juliet tilted her head to the side "What is it, Jack?"

"If we were.. Going anywhere with this?"

She dropped her gaze to the car floor and didn't say anything, as Jack continued.

"I mean, you won't even let me pick you up at your house, it's always "Meet you there, Jack", or "I can get a cab, it's fine really, Jack".. If you just want to be friends, please tell me now Juliet, before I make a complete fool out of myself!"

Juliet stayed silent, choosing her words carefully. "I.. I don't know what I want, Jack", she could tell he was not satisfied with her answer. She opened the car door slightly and paused. "You wanna walk me to my door?".

The awkward atmosphere lifted almost immediately.

…..

With every step, Jack was becoming increasingly nervous. Should he put his arm around her waist, hold her hand? Did she want him to? Or was she happy with them just walking beside each other, fingers brushing against each other's every now and then? Should he hug her when they arrived at her front door? Kiss her? He knew he wanted to kiss her.. But did she want him to kiss her? He was so confused, he had never been any good on dates. Was this even a date?!

They both walked up Juliet's front steps in silence. She started rummaging around in her bag for her keys. When she found them she turned to Jack "I'm sorry, Jack.. I just don't want anything to move too fast you know, it's been so long since I've seen you and.."

"It's okay Juliet, really. The way we are now is perfect, and I've been loving every second of it while I'm with you".

Juliet nodded agreeing with him "Me too, the last few days have been amazing, Jack, I really feel like I've.."

Suddenly his lips were pressed against hers and his arms were wrapped around her waist, pulling her closer. It had been so long since he had felt her soft lips against his, and so long since her body had been pressed against his. Jack knew there was no going back after this kiss, he wouldn't be able to let her go.

Juliet pulled away from him slowly, breathing heavily, not daring to look him in the eye. She didn't know what to say. Ben's words came flooding back to her.

"_You may have moved on but Jack hasn't, he's still in love with you". _

Juliet shoved her key in the lock and pushed open her door. Jack got the message, she didn't want that. She hadn't wanted him to kiss her. And now she probably wouldn't want anything to do with him. He had ruined it for both of them. Jack turned and was about to make his way down the steps when he left Juliet's hand grasp his arm from behind. He turned back around to face her. Juliet looked into his eyes, not saying a word as she pulled him in through the doorway. She slid her hands to his shoulders and pushed him against the door, causing it to shut with a bang behind him. Juliet studied his face. He could see her eyes moving from his lips and back up to meet his gaze. He didn't dare to say anything.

Her arms slid around his neck as she began to kiss him softly. It wasn't until this moment, both realised just how much they had missed each other. Their kiss became more passionate, buttons became undone, and clothes came off.

Juliet knew what she was doing was wrong. But it was Jack. It was her and Jack.

Consequences would come later.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

Jack watched her sleep, nestled in between the blankets beside him. He loved her so much. He wanted to go outside and scream it from the rooftop, but didn't in fear of waking her. Pulling a strand of hair from her face he left little kisses from her shoulder to her mouth. Juliet's eyes fluttered open and she smiled at him. "Morning"

"I thought you were sleeping", muttered Jack in between kisses.

"Well I was trying to, but it's a little hard to when you've got somebody staring at you"

"Can you blame me?", Juliet giggled and slipped her arms around his waist. "I missed this, you know, I never really realised how much until now". Jack pulled her closer and buried his head in her hair. "I've been missing you since the second I left you", he said as he kissed the top of her head. "And I want it to stay like this forever, just you and me"

It was then Juliet was thrown back to reality. She shut eyes. When she didn't answer Jack tilted her head up. "Hey, you alright Jules?"

She shook her head "No actually Jack.. I'm not", she sat up wrapping the duvet around her, Jack could see she had tears forming in her eyes.

"What.. What is it Julie? Are you okay?", Jack got up and attempted to wrap his arms around her, but she gently pushed him off. "You think we're going too fast, is that it Juliet? Because I'd wait forever for you, you know that.." But Juliet was shaking her head.

"No.. No it's not that, I just.. I have something to tell you, Jack", she wiped the tears from her face and took a deep breath. It was killing her to do this.

"Jack, I'm married"


	8. Chapter 8

-1**Chapter 8**

Jack felt as if his heart had been ripped out of his chest, torn into tiny fragments, thrown by the sidewalk and trampled on until he could feel no more. It felt worse than when he crashed on the island, worse than when he thought his father might be sleeping with his ex-wife.. It even felt worse than when Sarah left him. His eyes travelled down the duvet - not baring to look her in the eye. His whole life was crumbling to pieces before him, at last, he thought he would be happy with Juliet back in his life. Yet she seemed to have forgotten to mention the fact that she had exchanged vows with another man.

Juliet clasped her right hand to her mouth, with tears streaming freely down her face she moved her other hand to Jack's. He pulled away, still refusing to look at her.

"I'm sorry Jack". It was barely more than a whisper, inaudible.

After minutes of silence, apart from the faint sound of Juliet's whimpers, Jack looked at her. He looked angry. Angry like the day the had first met. Though Juliet could also see sadness in his eyes, and it killed her inside seeing him like this.. And knowing she had caused it.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

Jack had asked her calmly, he looked calm, but his anger was building up inside of him. For the second time that morning he wanted to scream, but for completely different reasons. Now he wanted to scream at Juliet. Scream at her for doing this to him. But he remained calm.. For a little while anyway.

"I .. I couldn't Jack.. I love you, I didn't want to hurt you", Juliet whispered choking on her tears "Please.."

Jack decided to ditch being calm, being calm in the past had gotten him nowhere, and it certainly wasn't getting him anywhere now. He wanted Juliet to know how he felt, he wanted her to hurt as much as he was. He wanted to hurt her. Just like she hurt him.

"And you thought by doing this you wouldn't hurt me, Juliet?!", Jack got out of bed and started to pull on his clothes "How could you even think for one second I wouldn't be even slightly phased by this!". When he was fully dressed he turned to face her. "I mean, you take me back here, and we sleep together! We sleep together.. In the bed you share with him! The bed you and your husband have made love in! And you just expect me to take that!"

Juliet found it hard to speak, of course she hadn't expected him to take this. She hadn't exactly lied to him.. But she hadn't told the truth either, which was probably worse.

"Jack please, I didn't mean to hurt you, I.. I love you Jack, please don't do this to me!"

He leaned in close to her.. If looks could kill..

"Don't do this to you?! What about what you've done to me, Juliet! You know I'm crazy about you, I always have been, and you just.. You go off and you marry another man!"

Now it was Juliet's turn to be mad. "I married another man because I never thought I'd see you again! You left me on that island with no intention of ever coming back! I married another man because I was in love with another man! I moved on Jack! Don't you dare try to blame me because you didn't!". Juliet's eyes were still red, but she had stopped crying. She fought back the tears as best she could, she wasn't going to let Jack leave thinking she had been wrong to marry another man. She didn't want to Jack to leave full stop. But she knew it was going to happen.

Neither of them spoke.

Jack's eyes wandered around the room, he fixed them on a photo framed on the wall. It was of them. On their wedding day. How could he have been so stupid not to notice something like that, right in front of him.

"So where is he now, Juliet? Blissfully unaware of the fact his wife has just been screwing around with somebody else, I suppose?"

Juliet looked at him shocked "Screwing around?", she felt broken "You said you loved me"

"I don't know anymore Juliet.. I just don't know".

Juliet's bottom lip trembled, she blinked back the tears. Jack knew he had hurt her. He also knew he had lied, but he wanted her to feel the way he had. The way he still did. But he couldn't bare to watch her.

Jack forced himself to break away from her and pull the bedroom door open. Without saying a word he made his way down the stairs, picked up his jacket and tie from where they had been thrown on the floor last night. He couldn't hear any sounds coming from upstairs. Somewhere inside of him he wanted Juliet to come rushing down the stairs, he wanted to pick her up in his arms and tell her that he was sorry for shouting at her, he wanted to kiss her and tell her it was all going to be okay. But he couldn't.

Sighing he opened the front door and was about to leave when he saw a car pulling up in the drive way. It was him. He knew it. Jack quickly shut the door. A part of him wanted to walk straight up to this man and tell him just what him and his wife had done last night. In detail.

Even feeling the way he did now, he decided he couldn't do something like that to Juliet. He still loved her, he just didn't want to admit it.

Jack hurried to the back of the house, passing numerous photographs of Juliet and her husband. His eyes locked on the backdoor just as he heard a key turning in the lock of the front one. As quietly as possibly he edged open the door and slipped outside to the fresh morning air. Jack shut the door and walked down the long road to where his car had been parked.

Thoughts of the previous night still fresh in his memory.


	9. Chapter 9

-1**Chapter 9**

Juliet lay and cried against her pillow, the blanket wrapped tightly around her. She heard the faint sound of a door slamming below, Jack had gone. She shut her eyes and pulled her knees to her chest.

He was gone, and she could never get him back.

_How could you have been so stupid, Juliet? You're a married woman!_

But she did love him. Juliet tried to tell herself time and time again that she didn't, but her feelings towards Jack wouldn't go away. Then a voice came from downstairs.

"Juliet, honey you home?"

Juliet's eyes snapped open and she suddenly felt very sick. A thousand thoughts crossed her mind - had he seen Jack leaving? Had her own husband seen another man leaving her house? Had she just ruined her marriage?

Not answering Juliet leapt from the bed, pulled on her pyjamas and ran across the hall to the bathroom. She turned the key in the lock and pushed her back against the door. Rushing to the mirror she could hear Derek making his way up the stairs. It was obvious she had been crying. There was a knock on the door.

"Juliet, you in there?"

She couldn't pretend that she wasn't. Juliet opened the bathroom door and hoped that somehow Derek wouldn't noticed how red her eyes were. Unfortunately, he did.

"Sweetheart, what's wrong, are you okay?", she could tell he was worried about her. Juliet began to feel worse about sleeping with Jack.

Juliet sniffed as he pulled her in close to him "Yeah.. Yeah I'm fine. It's just .. Allergies"

_Oh how original, Juliet! You impregnate a male field mouse and this is the best you can come up with? _

Derek didn't argue it "Maybe getting back to bed would be the best thing, Jules, and I can go and pick you up some medication, okay?", he said stroking her hair.

"You don't have to do that, I'll be.."

"I know they say doctors are the worst patients, don't you start now"

Juliet looked up to face him and gave him a weak smile "I'll.. Go back to bed then?". Derek nodded and kissed her softly. She felt like bursting into tears there and then.

…..

Juliet sat at her kitchen table staring blankly into her coffee. Derek buttered some toast, put it on a plate and slid it across the table to her. She didn't feel like eating.

There was silence in the room. Juliet suddenly began to feel very paranoid.

"You'll never guess who I was talking to yesterday, Jules", Derek said shoving a piece of toast into his mouth.

Grateful that the silence had been lifted Juliet broke away from the staring competition with her coffee. "Who?"

"Well..", he said in between mouthfuls "He says he knows you".

Juliet's stomach dropped. He didn't look angry, nor did he look pleased. She knew lots of people.. An old patient of hers maybe? Jin! No, Jin doesn't speak English..

Not waiting for an answer Derek continued "His name is Benjamin Linus.. You know him?". Juliet decided there was no point in lying. "Yeah.. Yeah I know him.. From the.."

"Island, yeah, he told me". Juliet averted her eyes back to her coffee.

"I though you didn't want anything to do with those people, Julie?"

"I didn't.. He found me.."

"Why didn't you tell me he had called into your office?"

Juliet shrugged "I didn't see why I should bother you with it, it wasn't important, he just wanted to say hi"

"Yeah, yeah.. I just thought you would have told me, that's all", he walked over to her and put his arm around her shoulder "You alright?"

Juliet sighed in relief "I'm fine", she gave him a small smile.

Derek picked up her piece of toast and started to eat it "He also said something about a .. John Shepherd". Before Juliet knew what she was doing she had already corrected him, "Jack Shepherd", she clasped her hand over her mouth, disguising her actions by faking a cough.

"He said.. That you two had been out together once or twice.. That right Jules?"

She felt as if she was being interrogated by her own husband "Yes.."

"Now, I thought if you had been going out and seeing other men you would have at least told me on that one Juliet.. Or maybe I'm just old fashioned"

"It's not like that Derek, we were good friends, we wanted to catch up", she forced herself to look him in the eye "I would never cheat on you.. I love you".

Juliet had never lied to her husband. Until she and Jack had started seeing each other again. She had lied about where she was going, lied about who she was calling, lied about who she was seeing, lied about how she was feeling.. Her married life was quickly turning into a web of lies, she didn't want Derek to be another Edmund.

Derek stroked her cheek "I know.. I just don't want anybody upsetting you Juliet, I love you too much for that".

Tears sparkled in her ocean blue eyes as he kissed her again.

She loved him.. But she wanted Jack back.


	10. Chapter 10

-1**Chapter 10**

They hadn't seen each other in two weeks, and Jack realised it was the longest two weeks of his life. Knowing that she was out there, knowing that they could see each other whenever they wanted.. But obviously not wanting to.

He was waiting for her.

Jack knew he couldn't go to see her. He had shouted at her, made her cry. He couldn't just walk up to her and expect her to forgive him for that.. Though how could he be expected to forgive her.

Jack shook his head and poured himself a cup of coffee. He looked at his watch - 3am. He hadn't been able to sleep. He looked around his apartment, it was a mess. It was amazing how just having Juliet there had actually made him clean his apartment and shave his beard. Kate had told him to shave once.. He didn't do it.

Jack pushed a pile of old newspapers and pizza boxes off his chair and sat down. Placing his coffee down on the table he started to doze off, when there was a knock on the door. His eyes snapped open as he wondered who would possibly be calling around at this time. Jack made his way through the mess and pulled open his door.

Juliet stood there holding an umbrella.

"Hi" she said quietly. "I hope I didn't wake you"

Jack bit his lip "No.. I wasn't sleeping"

"Me either"

They stood looking at each other for a couple of minutes, not quite sure of what to say. Jack could tell she had been crying, her eyes looked red and sore.

"Won't your husband be wondering where you are, Juliet.. He might get suspicious if you go out in the middle of the night in the lashing rain"

Juliet shivered slightly "He doesn't.."

"Of course he doesn't"

Juliet looked away from him. He could see goose pimples on her skin, she looked cold. "Do you.. Want to come in?". He hated himself for asking it, but he couldn't let her go again.

He stepped back against the door allowing her to go in. Jack shut the door behind them. Neither of them spoke.

Juliet's eyes wandered around his apartment, it looked different from the last time she saw it. Darker and it smelled different too. It didn't smell like Jack.

"I .. I wanted to see you". She said it as if she was ashamed of it, a part of her was.. Ashamed of what she had neglected to tell him. "I wanted to tell you that I'm sorry, Jack… For what I did to you. I never meant to hurt you, I hope.. I hope you can understand that."

Juliet turned and reached for the handle of the door, she wasn't about to let him see her cry again. But he pulled her back to face him.

"Does he know about us, Juliet?.. Does he know what we did?"

She tried her best to fight the tears, not here, not now. She shook her head "He knows.. About you, but he doesn't know about that night.."

"How does he know about me? Did you.. Tell him, did he see me leaving?"

Juliet shook her head again, tears forming at the corners of her eyes "Ben.. He got off the island too Jack. He said that I had to tell you about my.. About my husband or else he would tell you himself"

Jack felt sorry for her, he almost wanted her to break down in tears just so he could have an excuse to hold her. "Well he didn't.. tell me Juliet, it's okay.."

A single tear rolled down her cheek "It's not okay, Jack, it will never be okay", more tears escaped her.

Before he knew what he was doing, he had his arms wrapped around her pulling her close to him. Juliet clung onto him, crying into his chest "I'm sorry, Jack, I'm so sorry, please forgive me.. You have to understand.."

"I forgive you, Juliet, I forgive you.. It's gonna be okay, I promise"

"I'm scared, Jack"

He pulled back to look at her, a questioning look in his eyes. "Scared of what, Juliet?"

She shook her head and pulled him closer to her, but he moved away "Juliet what is it? You can tell me"

"No Jack, I can't.. I shouldn't have said anything.. I'm sorry"

He didn't want to push her in fear of driving her away. She resumed her position wrapped tightly in his arms.

"It will all be okay, Juliet. I promise"


	11. Chapter 11

-1**Chapter 11**

Juliet crept into her house and shut the door quietly, in fear of waking Derek. She wasn't one to sneak around, nor did she like doing it. Keeping secrets from each other was how her and Edmund started to drift apart.

She slipped off her shoes and hung her jacket on the wall. The clock on the wall told her it was 5:50am. Juliet yawned as she entered the kitchen, rubbing at her eyes.

"Where were you, Jules?"

Juliet's heart skipped a beat as she locked eyes with Derek. He was sitting at their dinning table, an emotionless expression on his face. Juliet didn't say anything.

"I just asked you, Juliet.. Where were you?"

_How in the world did you ever think you could get away with this, Juliet? He's not stupid … or blind for that matter. He's going to notice if you're not in your bed at 3 in the morning! _

"Derek, I.."

"You were with him, weren't you?" His voice started to rise, he stood up from the table and made his way across the room to her.

Juliet refused to make eye contact "I.. don't know what you're talking about"

Derek took her face in his hands and tilted her head up. "You were with him, Julie. I know you were, so don't even think about lying to me"

She stared into his brown eyes and he stared back. Juliet suddenly became very aware of how much Derek resembled Jack. She had chosen a husband who reminded her of her previous lover. If that didn't prove how she felt about Jack, she didn't know what did.

Juliet decided she wasn't going to lie "Yes Derek, I was with him" His facial expression changed, he looked hurt - she couldn't blame him, but she wasn't going to stop there.

"I was with him tonight, and I was with him the night you were on your business trip, I was with him on all the nights I told you I had to work late. Or when I was visiting my sister.. He's her doctor you see, so it.."

Juliet stopped talking, she didn't know what she was doing. Why was she saying these things? If anything she should have admitted to seeing Jack tonight and beg for Derek's forgiveness. She didn't want to lose him, he was the best thing that had happened to her since the island … since Jack.

She gulped "I'm. .I'm sorry"

Derek let go of her and slowly paced around the kitchen, his hand placed over his mouth "What was it Juliet? I mean.. what possessed you to do something like that to me, huh? Is it because I go away on business trips every once in a while? Are you not.. Are you not satisfied with me Juliet, is that it - so you feel you have to go running off to this John person.."

"His name is Jack!"

She hadn't meant to shout it. She had never been able to keep her cool during arguments - they usually involved her crying or totally erupting at somebody.

Derek took one last look at her before storming out of the kitchen. She followed him "Where are you going?"

He pulled on his jacket and turned back to face her "I don't know, just out Julie, is that okay?! Maybe you can invite Dr. Shephard round, it really would be a shame to miss out on such an opportunity!" He grabbed his car keys from the table and pulled open the front door "Tell him Derek says hey, won't you?"

The door slammed.

Derek knew exactly where he was going.

He was going to find Jack Shephard


	12. Chapter 12

-1**Chapter 12**

"Happy to be going home Miss Carlson?"

"Oh of course, I've spent way too much time in hospitals as it is"

Jack smiled and handed Rachel her bag "Is somebody coming to pick you up?". She put her bag on her shoulder and took Julian's hand "Yes, Juliet should be here any minute now", Rachel looked up expecting to see Jack blushing like crazy again, like the first time she had mentioned her to him, however the smile faded quickly from his face.

"What happened?", she said quietly, though inside she had a feeling she already knew.

"Why didn't you say something? You could tell I still loved her and that I would do anything to have her" Rachel looked down at Julian who had his usual confused expression on his face whenever Jack was in the room "Because you're better for her than he'll ever be, and I just wanted my sister to be happy"

Jack sighed "It's okay, don't worry about it, it's just that.."

"Dr. Shephard?"

Jack turned around and found himself facing Dr. Ryan "Yeah, what is it?"

"There's someone out in reception asking for you, says he's got something you need to sign for or.. Something", he scratched his head and took a step back outside the door "Or maybe not, I don't know he wasn't very clear Dr. Shephard, he just said.."

"Okay, I get it", said Jack "I'll be right out"

Dr. Ryan left the room in somewhat or a hurry as Jack made his way to the doorway.

"I better go see what this guy wants". Rachel nodded as Jack left the room.

…..

Jack took a quick look around the reception area, he couldn't see anyone Dr. Ryan might have been referring to - just patients and doctors seemed to be passing by.

"Was someone out here asking for me?", he asked the receptionist. She lazily pointed a finger towards far wall.

"Jack, I presume?"

Jack turned around and was just about to answer when a fist came crashing against his face and he was thrown against the reception desk. He felt the man's fist come down hard on his face twice again until he was forcefully pulled off him.

Jack held his hand up to his nose in a desperate attempt to wipe the blood away. All of the patients and doctors had stopped and were standing around whispering. Jack brought his gaze up to the man's, who was struggling with a terrified looking Dr. Ryan.

"He's sleeping with my wife, Shephard is sleeping with my wife!"

All of a sudden all eyes were on Jack. There was no denying it. It was the truth and Jack wasn't ashamed of it.But he wasn't just sleeping with his wife.

He loved her.

Derek continued to struggle with Dr. Ryan until he hit him hard across the face , which sent Derek to the ground. Dr. Ryan loosened his grasp and brought his hands to his mouth in shock "I didn't.. I didn't mean to do that! Oh no..". He got down on his knees and tried to haul Derek to his feet. Derek pushed him back and stood up facing Jack, a livid look on his face.

There was a silence in the reception area as Derek took a step forward and pointed at Jack.

"You.. You are trying to steal my wife! You think you can just ease yourself back into her life, after years of never seeing her, never even bothering to contact? If you cared you would have contacted. If you cared you would want her to be happy! Happy with me - the man she loves!"

Despite the circumstances and the location Jack found himself shouting back at him "I do care! I care more than you know! I am in love with Juliet, I love her more than anything else in the world!"

"You're a liar Shephard, I know of men like you. In fact I was one once. A lonely man. A man who couldn't get anything out of life, felt he wasn't going anywhere.. And then a beautiful woman comes along, and so you use her.."

Jack felt it hard to resist the urge to hit him. But no, not in the hospital, he wouldn't go back down that road again. "I did not use her! I love her. More than you ever could.. And she loves me too!"

It didn't seem to bother Derek that he was standing in the busiest place in a hospital with all eyes on him, he advanced towards Jack again "You say that again, Shephard and I'll kill you! My wife does not…"

"Stop!"

Both men turned to face the entrance, where Juliet was stood.

"Can't you see where you are? We are in a hospital, it is no place for.. For this!". Jack and Derek stayed silent. "Please just.. Stop"

Nobody made a sound. Out of the corner of his eye Jack saw Rachel and Julian standing at the end of the hall. Rachel had a look of shock on her face, Julian looked confused, yet slightly amused at seeing these two men fight over his Aunt Juliet.

The receptionist behind Jack cleared her throat "Alright people, nothing to see here, show's over, come on let's keep it moving!". A couple of people looked relieved as they rushed down separate halls, others looked slightly disappointed to be told to leave.

"I think it would be in the best interest of everybody here if you all took this somewhere a little more private"

Jack nodded and turned to Juliet, their eyes met. He suddenly became very aware that his nose was still bleeding - he wiped it on his sleeve hastily.

"I suppose we better.."

"No, no I'm not going anywhere Jules".

Juliet sighed and faced him "Look we can't sort this here, you two have caused enough of a scene as it is, if we just.."

"What is there to sort Julie?" Derek shrugged "So I punched the guy, it happens you know.. He's lucky I didn't kill him after what he did with you.. I guess we can just go home now right? I've had my say, I've let the anger out. So I don't see why we need to sort anything out with him?"

Juliet tried her best to keep her voice lowered "What the hell are you talking about, Derek? We can't just go home, don't you want to.. Don't you understand what is going on here?"

That angry look returned to his face "Yes Juliet, I do. You cheated on me. You cheated on me with him, but you know.. I guess I saw it coming didn't I? I'm never home, I never call you when I'm not home.. But I'm gonna forgive you Juliet because you're my wife" Derek paused and closed his eyes for a moment "And I love you"

Jack snorted "Oh please"

"Jack please don't.. I can't do this here.." Juliet held her hands up to her eyes and rubbed at them furiously. Derek moved closer to her and attempted to pull her into a hug but she edged away.

"No, no just.. Just leave me both of you, I can't do this here". She almost wanted the tears to come. Just so they could see how much this was hurting her, and so Derek would realise that she wasn't just sleeping with Jack, she loved him. But they wouldn't.

Juliet ran to the bathroom and locked the door behind her. She slid down the wall hugging her knees to her chest, allowing the tears to flow freely.

She stayed sitting on the bathroom floor crying, until there was a soft knock on the door.

"Juliet, honey it's me, let me in"

At the sound of Rachel's voice Juliet forced herself to her feet and shakily unlocked the latch. Rachel came in, shut the door behind her and immediately took Juliet in her arms.

"Oh Julie, what am I going to do with you?"

She didn't answer, just continued to cry. Rachel stayed quiet for a couple of minutes letting Juliet catch her breath.

"What are you going to do, Julie?"

"I don't know, I just don't know"

"Because you know you can't have both of them"

Juliet smiled weakly "Yeah.. yeah I know that"

"Are you going to leave him?" Juliet looked at her sister, with a confused expression on her face. "You think I should leave Derek don't you?"

"I didn't say that, I was.."

"No, you're right"

Now it was Rachel's turn to look confused "Then why don't you? You love Jack, I know it, he knows it, you know it"

Juliet sighed, took some tissues and dabbed at her eyes "Because it's not that simple Rachel. God knows I wish it was"

She pulled Juliet into another hug "What is it Jules? What's wrong? Has Derek been abusing you? I always told you he was no good for you, I.. "

Juliet took a deep breath in to calm herself. "No, no, he hasn't been abusing me. Rachel I.. I'm pregnant..

And it's his - it's Derek's"


	13. Chapter 13

-1**Chapter 13**

Juliet's eyes flickered open, the first thing she saw was Rachel standing by her bed holding a plate of toast and a mug of coffee.

"Good morning Jules", she smiled sadly at her sister as she set the plate and mug down "I thought you could use some breakfast"

Juliet sat up rubbing at her eyes "Thanks Rach, but I'm not really hungry". Rachel nodded and sat herself down at the edge of Juliet's bed. "When are you going to tell him?"

"I can't tell him Rachel, not now, not after what's just happened!". She pulled her knees to her chest and sighed "He won't want it, not that he would have in the beginning anyway.. And he won't want me either"

"Hey Juliet, don't say that". Rachel moved closer to Juliet and put her arm around her "He called 7 times you know, Derek did.. Wanting to know if you were okay, why you didn't come home last night. He's worried about you"

"I thought you never liked my husband, why are you sticking up for him?"

She let go of Juliet and stood up form the bed, a smile spreading across her face "Well … obviously Derek was not as worried about you as somebody else was". Juliet looked at her sister, confused "What do you mean?"

"Jack's been here for the past two hours waiting for you to wake up, Jules.. He wants to see you"

"I don't know, Rachel"

"Oh, come, Juliet just talk to him.. It's the right thing to do, he loves you"

Juliet stared at the floor, lost in her own thoughts. "Okay.. Okay I'll talk to him"

……

She made her way to the hallway where Jack was pacing up and down. His eyes locked on her. "Oh Juliet" . He ran to where she stood and picked her up, she flung her arms around his neck, whispering through tears that she was sorry.

"Don't apologise Juliet, you don't have any reason to be sorry, it will all be okay, I promise you.. We'll sort this out, don't worry", he kissed her cheek and pulled her closer to him. "I want to be with you, Jack. I need you".

Jack slid his arms from around her waist and brought them up to her tear streaked face "Are you sure, Juliet?"

She gazed into his hazel eyes, losing herself in them and nodded slowly. "But.. I can't leave my husband"

"Why can't you? If I want this.. And you want this, why can't you, Juliet?

"It's complicated". Jack sighed and wiped a tear away from her face "Why is it complicated?"

_I can't tell him, I just can't.. But he deserves to know, after everything else I've neglected to tell him. .I owe him this. _

She exhaled slowly "It… it just is"

Jack nodded, she could see the sadness in his eyes. "Okay.. Okay I understand"

"I just need more time Jack.. Please don't give up on me - I don't know what I would do without you, please.."

He pulled her back into his arms and stroked her hair "I'm not giving up on you Juliet. I'd wait for you forever"


	14. Chapter 14

-1**Chapter 14**

Juliet rolled down the car window and let the cool air fill her lungs. With her hands gripping the steering wheel firmly, she stared blankly into the distance. In her heart she knew she should have told Jack that she was pregnant, he didn't deserve to be left in the dark anymore.

After he had left, Juliet decided that she was going to let Derek know, and if he didn't want anything to with her or their child that was something she was going to have to deal with on her own.

Across the road Juliet could see her husband's car parked in the driveway. She pulled the keys out of the ignition and took a deep breath. There was no going back now. Holding the keys in her hand she opened the car door and stepped out, locking it behind her. Juliet wanted nothing more than to drive away, drive back to Rachel's where she knew she wouldn't have to face him. Or drive to Jack's, where she could just be with him. Just the two of them together, living happily ever after. She shook the thought out of her head and told herself that this was real life, there were no happy endings.

Juliet made her way through her front garden slowly, being careful not to make too much noise. She didn't want Derek to hear her and come outside, it would be impossible to tell him such a thing out in the open, anyone could hear. Though she was sure half the neighbourhood already knew she had been cheating on him. News travelled way too fast there.

She was surprised to find the door slightly a jar when she reached it. 'Typical Derek', she thought 'Leaving the door open through the night, anything could have happened' . Juliet immediately told herself she had no right to be thinking these things of him, after all it was her who had done wrong. Or maybe it was just that she didn't care anymore.

Juliet pushed the door open and stepped inside her house, it was dark inside. None of the curtains were open and none of the lights were on. For a few minutes the sight left Juliet wondering if Derek had gone out early this morning, when the dining room door swung open.

"Juliet?" Derek had a look of disbelief on his face, he rubbed at his bloodshot eyes as a smile spread across his tired face. "Juliet, you came back, you came back for me". He stumbled towards her, his smile widening and put his arms around her awkwardly. "I missed you baby, I missed you so much"

Juliet stayed perfectly still "You've been drinking.."

He pulled back from her and gave a small laugh "Well can you blame me really? I thought my wife had left me! And anyhow.. It was just a little, Julie. Don't you worry your pretty little head about me, I'm just happy that you're home".

He tried to pull her in close to him but Juliet pulled away. "Oh come on Juliet, it was three cans of.." Juliet shook her head "No, I don't care about the alcohol Derek, it's.. I think you better sit down. I have something that I need to tell you"

…..

Derek had sobered up completely. The news that his wife was pregnant had hit him like a tonne of bricks. They had never talked about having children before, her had never thought to ask her, he figured Juliet had enough on her plate managing her career without having a baby to come home to every night. She hadn't smiled when she told him, nor did she cry. Derek didn't know what to say at the time so they sat in silence. He wondered if she would have reacted differently if she hadn't just returned from her sister's house, if she hadn't supposedly 'left him'. Either way he didn't quite know how to react to it himself.

"Do you … wanna keep it Jules?"

"I don't know"

Juliet was assured by his asking her, that he wasn't happy. If he wanted this to happen he would have smiled like he did earlier when he saw her. Now she saw nothing in his expressionless face, except maybe fear, and a hint of guilt.

"And you're sure it's mine?"

She didn't blame him for asking "Yes, yes I'm sure. I found out before I had even known Jack was .. Before Rachel had had her accident, I mean". Derek exhaled slowly "Then why didn't you tell me sooner?"

"I don't know Derek, Rachel was in hospital and then I .." He knew she was going to mention Jack, he knew Jack was the reason Juliet didn't tell anybody she was pregnant. "This is about Jack isn't it?", he said it quietly, not a hint of rage in his voice because he already knew it to be true. "You can tell me Jules, I won't.. I won't be mad. I know it is about him so just say it"

Juliet nodded slowly, breaking eye contact with him "I think.. I think it was because I didn't want to scare him away. Jack had been my best friend on that island, he understood me. I thought if he found out I was carrying somebody else's baby he wouldn't want to see me anymore" Derek didn't answer her. "It's stupid, I know", Juliet continued "But it had been so long since I had seen him, I didn't want to mess anything up.

"But I guess it doesn't matter now anyway, because I've told you now. And I'm here with you now"

Derek felt tears prickling at the back of his eyes, it had been years since he had cried, and now he didn't know what it was for. Was it because Juliet had come back to him? Or was it because after he heard what she said just now, deep down he knew Jack could take better care of his wife? He shook that thought out of his head.

Juliet leaned across the dining room table and took Derek's hand in hers "I want to do this, I really do. But I just don't know if I can"

He nodded understanding as a single tear fell down the side of his face "Me too. I'd do anything to have you Juliet, you know that. And if being with you means having this baby, I'll be with you every step of the way" Juliet smiled slightly.

"We'll be okay, we'll get through this"

"Are we .. Are we gonna do this then?", Juliet saw a look of sadness in Derek's eyes. Regret even, when he asked her. But all the same, she nodded.

"Yeah, yeah we're gonna do this"


	15. Chapter 15

-1**Chapter 15**

She stood at the entrance to the hospital debating with herself whether or not to go in. St John's hospital was only a couple of miles away, but no - she was here now, there would be no point in coming all this way, only to turn around and leave, simply because she was scared.

The automatic doors slid open as a doctor talking on his cell phone strolled out, not acknowledging her standing there looking as worried as hell. Juliet told herself to grow up and made her way in threw the doors. She walked down the too familiar halls and minutes later found herself standing in front of an office door. Without bothering to knock Juliet let herself into the office and shut the door quietly behind her.

Jack looked up from what ever he was doing, a surprised look on his face, as Juliet edged herself closer to his desk.

"I.."

_.. wanted to see you… _The words were on the tip of her tongue but she couldn't bare to say them aloud.

This wasn't the reason she was here. Jack stood up waiting for her to continue.

"I'm pregnant Jack"

He stood where he was, now looking even more shocked than he had originally looked. Juliet realised she probably should have said something else first. "No, I mean.. It's not yours Jack, don't worry! It's.. Derek's". She bowed her head to the floor as she heard Jack breathe a sigh on relief, at least that's what she took it to be.

"Or at least it was.."

Jack tried his hardest to gather his thoughts "What do you mean … was, Juliet? Why are you telling me this now, I don't understand what's going on here" . One minute he was slowly working his way through a tremendous amount of paper work, the next he had Juliet standing in the middle of his office telling him she was pregnant. If anything it was simply random, and confusing as to why she was telling him now, when he knew that she had chosen Derek over him and knew that he would probably never see her again. Her being there was just making it all that harder for Jack to forget about her.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you, really I am", Juliet kept her head bowed as she spoke to him afraid to meet his eyes - afraid of what she might see. "I took another pregnancy test, just to be absolutely sure", she stopped , fiddling with the tips of her fingers, wondering for the millionth time that day if this was the right thing to do "And.. It was negative"

Jack pressed the palms of his hands into his eyes trying to sooth the pounding headache he had been getting too frequently lately. "Juliet it could have just been a faulty..", but she cut across him. "I bought test after test after test, Jack. All negative. If you want to try telling me they're all faulty too, be my guest, but I'll know.. I'll still know that I lost my baby"

He had no choice but to believe her, but he was still wondering why she was here. This wouldn't change anything between them? Would it?

"Aren't you upset? It was your child, Juliet.. Your's and your husband's"

"It was still early, I guess it hadn't sunk in yet, I never really thought it would happen after seeing every mother die on the island. I hadn't put all my hopes on it"

Jack walked across the room and stood directly in front of her, giving her no choice but to look him in the eye "Are you sure about that, Juliet?"

Now it was Juliet's turn to be confused about the situation "Yes, of course I'm sure, why..?"

"Are you sure that you didn't just tell Derek you were pregnant to save your marriage?"

Juliet's mouth opened but she didn't say anything for a couple of seconds "No.. why would I do something like that? I'm not lying Jack, why would you think something like that of me!?". Jack held his finger up to shush her "I'm not thinking it Jules, I was just asking. It's okay, I believe you".

Juliet tucked a piece of hair behind her ear "Oh.."

The two stood in Jack's office, the silence playing too loud for either to bare. And Jack realised she was still withholding the information to why she had turned up here in the first place. Almost as if she had read his thoughts, Juliet broke the tension.

"Anyway.. I'm here because me being pregnant was the only thing keeping my marriage together". Jack was becoming more convinced now that she had lied about her pregnancy, though he was willing to give her the benefit of the doubt, like he had done on so many countless occasions. "Derek won't say it, but he's barely uttered two words to me since I told him I miscarried", Juliet continued, her voice starting to sound that little bit more shaky, her bottom lip trembling slightly.

Jack sighed, finding it horrible to have to resist the urge to pull her into a tight embrace. "Juliet I'm sure he's just shocked, like anybody would be". He couldn't believe he was sticking up for this man. He could just as easily tell Juliet that Derek was being ungrateful, that she would be much better off with somebody else. Somebody like him. But Juliet was shaking her head.

"I left him, Jack", she bit her lip and closed her eyes, sending two silent tears falling down angelic her face. "It's clear he doesn't want me anymore, after everything that's happened between me and you.. And now this". Juliet shook her head, quickly brushing her tears away with her sleeve. "I've left him for you, Jack"

She lifted her head to face him, it seemed to her Jack was still trying to take in this information. She suddenly became worried, after all that had happened, Jack might not want her. He may have even moved on, just like she did. As quickly as it had came, she pushed the thoughts straight out of her head and kissed him softly on the mouth. Much to her surprise Jack responded. He slipped his hands around her waist, pulling her into a hug.

"You've really left him, Jules? For me?". He needed to hear her say it again just to be sure he hadn't been imagining it. He felt her nod beside him. Juliet pulled back to face him, with tears in her eyes, a big smile on her face. "It's always been you, Jack. Surely you knew that?"

"Well I had a feeling"

Juliet giggled and Jack grinned back at her "I love you so much"

"I love you too, always have done". They stood there smiling at each other when the door swung open, revealing a flushed looking Dr. Ryan "Dr. Shephard, Mrs. Haplin wants to see you, something about.."

"It can wait", Jack waved him off, never taking his eyes off Juliet.

"But"

"Out now, Jason!"

Dr. Ryan, looking absolutely terrified shut the door with a bang.

"You should haven gotten that, I'll still be here when you get back"

Jack laughed "Oh yeah? Well I'm not taking that chance, I love you too much to lose you again". Juliet flung her arms her around his neck, kissing him again "I love you too. Promise you won't ever leave me"

"Not unless you leave me"

Juliet hit him playfully "Promise, Jack!"

"Okay, okay, I promise!", and he kissed her again.

**The End**


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